We’d like to thank you for your time,
though we’ve decided to pursue
some other folks more in their prime
(though we must stress it’s us, not you!)

Now looking back, perhaps it was
the fact you came one minute late—
or maybe it was just because
we all could tell you weren’t straight.

Perhaps you rolled your sleeves too high
Or tied your tie a tad too tight.
Did you forget to zip your fly?
Your shirt was just a shade too bright.

I must note we were not impressed
with your stark lack of expertise—
we strictly hire but the best
and you could use some more degrees.

I can’t say quite what it might be:
was it your skin, your hair, your voice?
But surely you must also see
why we went with another choice.

I’m sure it’s nothing that has got
to do with you whatsoever—
Oh! And of course! I almost forgot:
Good luck in your future endeavors!

Regards,
Patty from HR